My Kids’ Mad Libs are Just as Inappropriate as Mine Were Two Decades Ago
You will never find my name listed under the heading, “Parents who Succeed at Teaching their Children a Sense of Propriety.”
You will never have people stopping me to say, “Oh, your children have such mature senses of humor. How ever do you keep them from making butt and fart jokes all day long?!”
And you will never find anyone in my house, and perhaps anyone in my extended family, who can do a Mad Lib without devolving into a complete and utter lack of propriety and a complete and utter surfeit of butt and fart jokes.
Miles’s efforts to finish his first ever Mad Lab last night demonstrates each one of the above points.
The Seven-Year-Old’s First Solo Mad Lib
Miles: Mom, what does “plural” mean?
Me: Plural indicates that there is more than one of something. So ‘ball’ is a singular noun. ‘Balls’ would be a plural noun.
Miles: Haha, balls.
Me: No, like baseballs. Or basketballs.
Miles: Or balls like NUTS! [gesticulating wildly] I’m gonna write “balls” here. This is gonna be hilarious.
Me: Good lord…you know, those two terms are slang terms, and the proper term is…
Miles: Hey Mom? What’s the plural of ‘ass’?
Me: You mean “ask”? Verbs don’t have…
Miles: No, I said ASSSSSS.
Me: **blink blink**
Miles: **wry grin**
Me: It’s ‘asses.’ And don’t ever say that word at your friends’ house. Or at school. Or at our house either. It’s too strong. It’s really just very inappropriate and…
Miles: Heh heh, balls and asses. This is gonna be the best Mad Lib ever.
Though I didn’t let on in that moment, I was secretly amused that together, he and I made the plural of “person with an inappropriate sense of humor.”